The Lies We Tell Ourselves: Am I Even Worth Hiring?
When I was getting out of the Army, I remember thinking, What do I actually have to offer? Sure, I could manage teams, run operations, keep things organized under pressure, but so had countless other officers. Out in the civilian world, there were management consultants, finance pros, and industry specialists with years of corporate experience. I wasn’t sure where I fit.
Through Hiring Our Heroes- a transition program for service members leaving the military where I interviewed with a variety of companies followed by a short-term internship- I saw a huge range of industries and roles. Some of them I thought I could get hired for, but I kept coming back to the same question: If I land the job, what would I actually deliver once I’m there?
I once believed that kind of self-doubt was rare, until I went through it myself. Now I know it’s not just me. After coaching people with MBAs, combat deployments, and a decade in management, I’ve heard the same line again and again: “I don’t know if I’m actually that impressive.” It turns out, feeling this way is completely natural.
Key Points:
Why self-doubt is more common than you think (even among high performers)
The mental spiral of comparing your inside to everyone else’s outside
How to look at your experience objectively (and break shame cycles)
The importance of external, honest feedback—not ego boosts
A simple exercise: list 3 outcomes you’re proud of and what they meant to others
When I first started interviewing, I followed the advice you see all over the internet: Match your resume to the job description. Use their language. Make sure you bring up their keywords in the interview. The logic made sense… on paper. But in reality, it made me sound like I was trying too hard to be something I wasn’t.
Here’s the problem: if you’re switching industries, the interviewer already knows you haven’t done this exact job before. Your resume makes that obvious. And when you try to force in hyper-specific jargon from their world, you risk coming across as insincere, and worse, you can’t think or speak naturally. And the whole point of an interview is to have a real, fluid conversation.
What finally changed everything for me was realizing I didn’t have to pretend. If I just spoke about my experience honestly and emotionally, showing how I solve problems, lead people, and deliver results, they could do the work of connecting the dots. They could see how I might fit into their world.
Because in the end, most hiring managers are looking for someone who’s smart, willing to learn, and someone they actually want to work with. One of my old bosses used to put it perfectly:
“I can teach you the widget.”
Meaning, the technical stuff can be learned. What matters most is drive, character, and the ability to work well with others. And if your experience and your stories show those qualities, you’re worth hiring.
This kind of self-doubt is far more common than we admit especially among high performers. The more you’ve done, the more aware you become of what you haven’t done. It’s easy to dismiss your accomplishments as “just part of the job” while assuming everyone else’s LinkedIn profile is the full truth. But you’re comparing your behind-the-scenes to their highlight reel. That’s a losing game.
The real problem is this: when you let that internal narrative take over, you can’t tell your story clearly. You undersell. You hedge. You rush through the parts that matter most. And if you’re not confident in your own value, why should a hiring manager be?
One of the most powerful shifts you can make is learning to view your experience objectively. Not through a lens of shame or comparison, but with curiosity and honesty. What did you actually deliver? Who benefited? What changed because you were there? This isn’t about ego. It’s about clarity.
Try this:
Write down three outcomes you’re genuinely proud of, big or small.
Then ask yourself: What changed for someone else because I did that?
Most of the time, the things you’re proud of are moments where you actually solved a real problem. Maybe it was a personal challenge for someone, or a measurable company objective. Either way, someone was having a worse day before you stepped in and you made it better.
When you tell those stories, you’re showing more than just the fix. You’re showing that you cared enough to address the issue, that you coordinated across people and teams, that you operationalized the solution and saw it through. Those are exactly the qualities any company wants in an employee.
The size of the win doesn’t matter. What matters is how you tell the story and that it reflects the way you think, work, and connect with others. Because remember what my old boss said:
“I can teach you the widget.”
They can train you on the technical stuff. What they can’t teach is initiative, collaboration, and the drive to make things better. That’s what these stories reveal and that’s what gets you hired.
Because yes, you are worth hiring. You just have to believe it enough to show them.
